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How to Be a Dom: 16 Steps to Becoming a Dominant Man

So you want to be a Dom? True masculine Dominance is in short supply these days. This complete guide to becoming a Dominant man will lead you through 16 steps to developing your inner and outer Dominance so that submissive women not only think you're a Dom, but can feel Dominance radiating from your core.

Become The Man She Craves Submitting To

In this training, master the 12 essential steps to become a good Dom—build the skills, mindset, and presence of a man she respects, desires, and willingly surrenders to. Learn to lead with confidence inside and outside the bedroom.

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Recent Articles

19 Submissive Positions Every Dom and Sub Should Know

Curious how submissive positions can transform your D/s dynamic? This guide breaks down the most essential submissive positions for training, protocol, rituals, and erotic play—helping you deepen connection, heighten power exchange, and create hotter, more intentional BDSM experiences.

Self-BDSM Practices, Solo Play, and Getting Freaky with Yourself

Curious about self BDSM? Learn how to explore kink on your own, build real skills, discover your desires, and prepare yourself for powerful D/s relationships—whether or not you have a partner.

When Your Need for Control Might Be Hurting Your Dynamic

What if the control you think you have in a D/s relationship is nothing more than an illusion? Explore how dominance is built—not through force or perfection, but through intention, consent, self-mastery, and real control.

Service Top: An Overlooked Role (Which Can Make You A Better Dom)

What does it mean to be a Service Top in BDSM? Discover how giving from the Top can be just as fulfilling as receiving, why Dominants should learn to serve too, and how genuine service deepens trust, pleasure, and connection.

BDSM Rules Explained: How to Create Structure Without Killing the Spark

What makes BDSM rules effective—and why do so many couples get them wrong? Discover how to create meaningful, sustainable BDSM rules that deepen trust, strengthen dynamics, and turn obedience into devotion.

Discipline Isn’t Punishment: The Secret to a Thriving D/s Relationship

Ever wondered how discipline can make your BDSM dynamic stronger and more erotic? Discover how expanding your understanding of discipline—beyond just punishment—creates structure, accountability, and deeper connection for both Dominant and submissive.

10 Hidden Benefits of a Dom Sub Relationship (Beyond Just Hot Sex)

What makes a Dom sub relationship so powerful? Discover the surprising benefits of power exchange, from deeper intimacy to hotter passion.

The Beginner’s Handbook to Attending a BDSM Play Party

Ever wondered what really goes on at a BDSM Play Party? Learn how to survive your first event, turn nerves into confidence, and have an unforgettable night of kink, connection, and fun—without feeling lost or overwhelmed.

Types of Doms: Which One Are You Meant to Be?

Curious about which Dom you are—or could become? Explore the different types of Doms in BDSM, from classic Masters to sensual Pleasure Doms, and learn how to find or craft a persona that fits your true desires.

BDSM Limits and Boundaries: Building a Sandbox for BDSM Play

What’s the difference between BDSM limits and boundaries—and why do they matter so much? Learn how to confidently set, communicate, and honor your BDSM limits and boundaries to create safer, hotter, and more connected power exchange dynamics.

How to Build Antifragile Mental Health

Struggling to take control of your mental health? This guide offers science-backed tools, personal insights, and vulnerable stories to help you build emotional resilience and become truly antifragile—so you can face life with strength, purpose, and clarity.

Why BDSM Play Is More Than Just Kinky Fun

What if BDSM play is more than just kink? Explore how BDSM play can become a powerful tool for psychological growth, shadow integration, and deeper self-awareness through role play.

Master the Dominant Mindset: 3 Keys to Authentic Power in the Bedroom

Want to step into a truly dominant mindset without feeling like you're just playing a role? Discover how embracing your authentic desires, removing shame, and learning to take control will transform your confidence and give your submissive exactly what she craves.

Do You Want a Dom, a Top, or Just Some Rough Sex?

Do you actually want a Dom, a Top, or just rough sex? Many people use the word "Dominant" without defining their desires, leading to frustration and disappointment. Learn the differences between rough sex, kinky play with a skilled Top, and power exchange with a Dom—helping you clarify what you want and communicate it effectively.

Building Trust in Dom/sub Relationship is a Two-Way Street

Explore the two sides of trust in Dom/Sub dynamics. Understand how to be trustworthy and how to trust your partner, creating a fulfilling and secure D/s relationship.

BDSM Rewards for Submissives

Has your submissive been a good girl? Need a way to encourage and appreciate her for her efforts? Learn about BDSM rewards for submissives including the 5 principles of rewards, the different systems and levels of rewards, and different types of rewards with examples.

BDSM Punishments for Submissives

Has your submissive broken a rule? Need a way to correct her behavior? Learn about BDSM punishments for submissives including the 7 principles of punishments, the different levels of punishment and how to choose the correct one, and different types of punishments with examples.

Two Must-Ask Questions for Better Sex

These two deceptively simple questions will change your sex life and drastically improve your chances of finding fulfillment in your pleasure.

Book Announcement - Enter the Dom: The No BS Book on Dominance

Announcing my upcoming book Enter the Dom: The No BS Book on Dominance

Not All DDlg is the Same: How to Enjoy DDlg without Ageplay

Curious about DDlg or Daddy Dom/ little girl dynamics in BDSM buy not sure about ageplay? Learn some misconceptions about DDlg, the psychology of someone who might enjoy it, and ways to experience without ageplay.

How to Deal with Sub drop Physically, Mentally, and Emotionally

Feeling down or out of energy after your intense BDSM scene? You're likely experiencing sub drop. This article will highlight what sub drop is and how to remedy it physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Brat Tamer: The Secret to Taming Brat Submissives

Have a bratty submissive on your hands? Learn the secret to taming brats, effective strategies and mindsets for being a brat tamer, and example punishments for brats.

Attending Your First BDSM Munch? Here’s What to Expect

Want to start getting into the kink scene and community? Try a munch, a social gathering for kinky people. In this article, learn what happens at munches, what to talk about, how to act, and where to find them.

What You Should Know About Consent in BDSM

Learn about consent in BDSM and the various models of consent including implied, express, and informed consent, plus the undervalued Wheel of Consent model.

A Pleasure Dom is Not What You Think It Is

What is a Pleasure Dom, really? If you think being a Pleasure Dom is just about giving orgasms, you're mistaken. This article will reveal to you what a Pleasure Dom is, their psychology, 9 sexy tools to use as a Pleasure Dom, how to be submissive for one, and an example scene for you to try.

3 Pillars to Structure the Perfect BDSM Scene

Want to craft a great BDSM scene? These 3 foundational pillars will equip you with an easy to use formula for you to create scenes that will help Doms and subs reach the heights of pleasure and depths of subspace.

7 Ways To Deal With Sexual Shame For Your Desires

Feeling shame for your sexual desires? This guide will give you 7 tactics for identifying the stories behind your shame and allowing you to break free from shame, accept yourself, and be able to flourish in your sexual expression.

How to Be a Dom: 16 Steps to Becoming a Dominant Man

3 Tools to Discover Your Sexual Turn Ons

How much do you actually understand your turn ons? Has a partner asked you how they could please you, and you just kind of stared at them blankly, unable to describe your desires? Do you really even know what you desire? If not, then here are 3 tools to help you explore your erotic mind and uncover your deepest sexual desires.

Men's Guide to Dominant Sex in the Bedroom

Want to have more dominant sex? Has your partner asked you to be more dominant in the bedroom? Or maybe it excites, but you have no idea where to start or how to develop your sexual dominance? Then this guide is for you.

What is a Good Dom: 7 Essential Behaviors for Dominants

Want to know the behaviors that make good dominants? If you're anything like me, you were lost in the beginning when trying to learn what it meant to be a good Dominant. A Dominant is the person who takes on the role of authority, control, and power over the submissive. A Top is someone who has the skills to perform acts on another person. But a Dominant is the why and the intention behind those acts. But what makes a good Dominant?

Resources

Developing Dominance Free Lessons

Tired of being the "nice guy" who finishes last? Ready to transform your relationships and ignite your sex life? "Enter the Dom" is your no-nonsense roadmap to mastering dominance, not just in the bedroom, but in every aspect of your life. Get a taste of this transformative guide with three powerful free chapters.

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Enter the Dom Free Chapters

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BDSM Punishment Ideas

Having trouble coming up with unique and effective ways to punish your sub for breaking the rules? Get the inspiration you need by downloading my free list of 81 Ways to Punish Your Submissive and find the one that's perfect for you!

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Dominant Dirty Talk Cheat Sheet

Want to learn how to dirty talk so that you drive your submissive wild? Here’s a free dirty talk cheat sheet containing 74 dirty phrases for you to use with your submissive. Practice and use them to quickly and easily spice up your dynamic and sex life!

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Sex Menu Template

A sex menu is a communication and self discovery tool. If you have a hard time speaking about sex in person, your desires, and your boundaries, it can be easier to write it down. Most people have also never taken the time to really express what turns them on, what they want in sex, and just leave it up to chance. In my experience, great consistent sex happens with communication (and a whole lot of fun along the way.) This free, easy to use template features 350+ kinky sex acts you can rate, make notes, and share with your partner!

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